Al Bundy: "I Care", by Al Bundy. When hooters jiggle around and I find nickels on the ground, I care. When a Mustang engine purrs and the bathroom is not hers, I care. When the pitchers on the mound and the wife is underground, I care. But when I've been playing this for days, I will kill anyone who stays, I SWEAR!
Bud: Kelly go get changed into your sleaziest dress.
Kelly: Which one?
Peg: Hi honey. Did you miss me?
Al: With every bullet so far.