Michael: You humans take something wonderful and ruin it just a little bit so you can have more.
Jason: I'm telling you, molotov cocktails work. Any time I had a problem and I threw a molotov cocktail...boom! Right away, I had a different problem.
Jason: [Chidi walks into Jason's bud hole] Oh, hey, homie. Thanks for your advice. I'm about to give Tahani the best gift ever. Check it. [Shows a painting of Frank Caliendo].
Jason: She likes impressionist paintings, right? I got her a painting of the best impressionist of all time, Frank Caliendo. He can do it all. Fat Al Pacino, fat Jerry Seinfeld, regular John Madden.