Jack Slater: Why am I wasting time with a dime-store putz like you when I could be doing something much more dangerous, like re-arranging my sock drawers?
Jack Slater: Here's another explosion for your movie, kid.
Nick: There are lots of things worse than movies: politicians, wars, forest fires, famine, plague, sickness, pain, warts, politicians.
Jack Slater: You already mentioned them.
Nick: I know I did. They are twice as bad as anything else.
Danny Madigan: Say this.
Jack Slater: Hey, grow up.
Danny Madigan: Just say this one word.
Jack Slater: Is this another one of your movie proofs?
Danny Madigan: Maybe.
Jack Slater: Kid... I don't want to say it.
Danny Madigan: Say what? You can't. You can't possibly say it because this movie is PG-13. Admit it.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: The studio should let me know when they are planning a stunt. You know, you are the best celebrity look-alike I've ever scene. If you get to Los Angeles, call my office. We can get you shopping center openings.
Jack Slater: Look, I don't really like you. All right? You brought me nothing but pain.
Danny Madigan: Where are the ordinary, everyday women? They don't exist because this is a movie.
Jack Slater: No, this is California.
Jack Slater: Who the hell are you?
Danny Madigan: Don't shoot me. I'm Danny Madigan. I'm a kid.
Jack Slater: Look! Elephant.
Jack Slater: I don't care who does what to your Hershey highway.
Jack Slater: And Whitney! Why can't she be like every other teenager. For prom night she stayed home and field stripped an AK-47.
Jack Slater: I mean, all I had to do, is just drive around the neighborhood, and point my finger at a house, and say 'The bad guys are in there!'.
Danny Madigan: OK, I got one. What about this girl right here. She is way too attractive to be working in a video store.
Jack Slater: I agree with you. I think she should be working with us... under cover of course.
Danny Madigan: What if staying in the car is what gets me killed?
Jack Slater: There's a gun in the glove compartment.
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