Sam Daniels: Just don't get negative on me.
Major Salt: Affirmative.
Sam Daniels: If you think I'm lying, drop the bomb. If you think I'm crazy, drop the bomb. But don't drop the bomb just because you're following orders.
Mrs. Pananides: I have a friend in the Coast Guard, all I have to do is call.
Sam Daniels: How close a friend?
Mrs. Pananides: Closer than his wife would like.
Sam Daniels: Anything I can do to help?
Major Salt: Just don't make me nervous.
Casey Schuler: I hate this bug.
Sam Daniels: Oh, come on, Casey. You have to admire its simplicity. It's one billionth our size and it's beating us.
Casey Schuler: So, what do you want to do, take it to dinner?
Sam Daniels: No.
Casey Schuler: What, then?
Sam Daniels: Kill it.
Sam Daniels: We are fugitives of the law. Idiocy is our only option.
Sergeant Wolf: This could mean my stripes, sir.
Sam Daniels: It'll mean your ass if you don't get your finger on the phone. Finger it.
Sam Daniels: Thank you, Mrs. - what was her name again?
Major Salt: Pananides.
Sergeant Meyer: Sir, my pilot is taking a leak.
Sam Daniels: A leak? No shit.
Sam Daniels: Sir, what did I ever do to make your life miserable?
General Billy Ford: You got up this morning, didn't you?
Casey Schuler: How many brain cells did I kill?
Sam Daniels: How many? About a billion.
Casey Schuler: Oh, now I'm only as smart as you.
Sam Daniels: What can we give him to kill his sense of humor?
Sam Daniels: You know Salt, fear gets a bad rap. I don't want anybody in my outfit that doesn't get scared.
Major Salt: Then I'm your man sir.
Casey Schuler: You want a hotshot scope-jockey, fine, but, frankly, I'm hurt.
Casey Schuler: I hate them willies, they ought to call them the Sams don't you think?
Answer: He wanted to eventually use it as a biological weapon.
raywest ★