Police Sergeant: You're drunk again, Arthur.
Arthur: No, I have remained drunk since our last encounter.
Arthur: Susan, mentally ill people are spontaneous. It's all about context.
Hobson: Evander, if he's not out of this ring in one minute I'll bite your other ear off.
Arthur: Congratulations, you're winning the dead parent game. But it's not too late to run home and butcher my mother.
Arthur: I'm talking about Tuscany! White truffle gelato! Have you ever tried white truffle gelato? It makes all other gelato taste like shit.
Arthur: We don't have any thing in common. You love horses. I don't trust them. Their shoes are permanent. Who makes that kind of commitment to a shoe?
Arthur: Who wouldn't want to marry a sexy clown?