Willy:...and I went to my father. And you know what he did? He kicked my ass. And do you know why?
Kid: Because you went to the bathroom on mommy's dishes?
Willy: Were you dropped on your head?
Kid: My head?
Willy: Of course your head. Who else's head are we talking about?
Kid: How can I be dropped on my own head?
Willie: I'm an eating, drinking, shitting, fucking Santa Claus.