Mr. Tidey: Well, what's happened?
Matron: I'm afraid it was another false alarm, Mr Tidey. You may as well go back to work.
Mr. Tidey: Go back to work? It was due three weeks ago.
Mr. Tidey: Well I'm sorry but babies tend to arrive when they feel like it. There's nothing we can do about it.
Mr. Tidey: That's a fine state of affairs, innit eh? We'd soon be in a right old mess if we ran the railways like that.
Matron: I was under the impression that you did.
Matron: I'm a simple woman with simple tastes, and I want to be wooed.
Sir Bernard Cutting: Ooh, you can be as 'wude' as you like with me.