Joon: You can't throw him out, I won him.
Joon: He can really cook, can't he?
Benny: Uh, yeah. Although for grilled cheese, I mighta used a wool setting.
Joon: That's what I told him.
Benny: Really? What-what did he use?
Joon: Silk would have been too soggy. Cotton would have.
Benny: Would have burned it.
Joon: Right. Fortunately, he consulted me before giving it steam. I was four square against it.
Benny: You can't bet a human being.
Joon: Don't underestimate the mentally ill. We know how to count.
Joon: Should we let him in?
Benny: Yeah, before someone slaps a stamp on him and sends him to Guam.
Joon: I lost.
Benny: What's in the pot?
Joon: A cousin.
Joon: Did you have to go to school for that?
Sam: No, no, I got thrown out of school for that.
Joon: She was given to fits of semi-precious metaphors.
Benny: The woman is a housekeeper, Joon, not an English professor.
Sam: Thanks for the couch. Um... Mike made me sleep under the sink.
Joon: Why do you hate me so much?
Benny: I don't hate you.
Joon: You need me to be sick.
Benny: So why'd you leave?
Ruthie: L.A.? I wasn't that good of an actress.
Benny: Well, that's not how Sam tells it. He's raving about you.
Ruthie: Yeah, well, he's sweeter than he is judgmental. How long have you known him?
Benny: Sam? Uh, 72 hours.
Ruthie: Be serious.
Benny: I am... serious.
Benny: I'm always serious. I'm too serious.
Joon: Having a Boo Radley moment, are we?
Joon: Some cultures are defined by their relationship to cheese.
Joon: Have we an internal sequin issue to deal with, Benjamin?