Father Meehan: If there's a devil in this town, it's that damned Reverend Willie Rose.
Alan: You believe me now, Father? You still think he's a decent man? The Devil just blew up your damn church.
Father Meehan: That's not the Devil. It's those God-damned Baptists.
Leland: I've always enjoyed ladies who take great pride in themselves.
Father Meehan: When I was younger, people got along better.
Leland Gaunt: The young carpenter from Nazareth? I know him well. Promising young man. He died badly.
Gaunt: Don't blame me, blame it on the bossa nova.
Alan: Do you believe in the Devil, Father?
Father Meehan: I guess I have to. You can't have one without the other. Do you believe in God, Alan?
Alan: What's he look like?
Father Meehan: Look like?
Alan: Yeah. The Devil. What the hell does he look like?
Father Meehan: Well, he looks like you and me, I imagine.
Alan: So he could get his claws in us without our ever knowing, make us do things that we normally would never do. Terrible things.
Buster: I just killed my wife. Is that bad?
Leland: Hey, these things happen.
Leland: Kill them all. Let God sort them out.
Leland Gaunt: Don't be afraid of it, Hugh. Guns don't kill people. People kill people.
Leland Gaunt: When I started out I was just a peddler moving across the blind face of a distant land. Moving, always moving. Always gone... and in the end I'd always offer weapons. And they'd always take them. Of course I was gone before they realised what they'd purchased.
Leland Gaunt: If it's too hot in here, Mr. Jewett, just say the word. I'm afraid I have a tendency to turn up the heat.
Brian Rusk: Mickey Mantle sucks.