John: How long you been fucking her?
[Jim looks awkward.]
John: It's a simple question.
[Jim looks down and sees John's wedding ring.]
Jim: How long you been fucking your wife?
John: I don't have one.
Jim: then why are you wearing a ring?
John: It makes people think I'm trustworthy.
Jim: Aren't you?
Jake Oleson: I saw them feeding on Grandma Helen. They're like, vampires, you know?
Stella Oleson: Vampires don't exist, Jake.
Amanda Dunfrey: I just want you to know that it's okay... being scared. And, well, if you need a friend, someone to talk too.
Mrs. Carmody: I have a friend. God, up above. I talk to him everyday. Don't you condescend me.
Amanda Dunfrey: I'm sorry?
Mrs. Carmody: Not ever. You don't mock me.
Amanda Dunfrey: That's not what I was doing.
Mrs. Carmody: I'll tell you what. The day I need a friend like you, I'll just have myself a little squat and shit one out.
Turner Claymore: Here at Berm-Tech we offer you a handshake, whether you have hands, hooks, or flippers.