Best comedy movie quotes of 2005
Please vote as you browse around to help the best rise to the top.Movie Quote Quiz
Grandpa Joe: Mr. Wonka, I don't know if you remember me, but I used to work here in the factory.
Willy Wonka: Were you one of those despicable spies who everyday tried to steal my life's work and sell it to those parasitic copycat candy making cads?
Grandpa Joe: No, sir.
Willy Wonka: Then wonderful, welcome back.
Helen: Orlando, what's going.
Orlando: I know you don't believe in fairy tales. But, if you did, I'd want to be your knight in shining armor. You've been through so much. I don't want to see you hurt anymore. Now I may not be able to give you all that your used to. But I do know I can love you past your pain. I don't want you to worry about anything. You just wake up in the morning, that's all you have to do and I'll take it from there. There's one condition. You have to be my wife.
Annie: I'm the most screwed-up person in the world.
Sarah: You're not even the most screwed-up person in this room.
[Quartermaine's hairpiece has been sucked up in the bunvac.]
Lord Victor Quartermaine: I want...toupee, please.
Wallace: Oh, grand. We take cheques or cash.
Lord Victor Quartermaine: Toupee, you idiot. My hair is in your machine.
Wallace: Oh, no, it's only rabbits in there. The hare I think you'll find is a much larger mammal.
Pickle Factory boss: Writer huh? Are you sure?
Henry Chinaski: No, I'm not. I'm halfway through a novel.
Pickle Factory boss: What's it about?
Henry Chinaski: Everything.
Pickle Factory boss: It's about... cancer?
Henry Chinaski: Yes.
Pickle Factory boss: How about my wife?
Henry Chinaski: She's in there too.
Big Mike: Well, you wouldn't put a frock on. If you don't want to get off with blokes, why put a frock on?
Lola: Thing is, Mike, ask any woman what she likes most in a man. Compassion, tenderness, sensitivity. Traditionally the female virtues. Perhaps what women secretly desire is a man who is fundamentally a woman.
Hadley Wolfmeyer: What kind of a dickhead runs away with his secretary? That is lame, take a right, make a left at pathetic.
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