Best TV quotes of 2003

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Star Wars: Clone Wars picture

Chapter 12 - S2-E2

Oro Dassyne: I wonder how many they'll send. We've got so much firepower in here, these walls are ray-shielded. They can't take this fort. It'll probably be, uh, fifty Jedi. They'll need at least that many. Huh, maybe a hundred Jedi! They'll never take this base with less. Ha, they'll need an army of Jedi!
Battle Droid: I have a visual.
Oro Dassyne: Jedi?
Battle Droid: I think so.
Oro Dassyne: How many? A thousand?
Battle Droid: No.
Oro Dassyne: Eighty?
Battle Droid: No, sir.
Oro Dassyne: What? Fifty?
Battle Droid: Less.
Oro Dassyne: Forty? Come on, how many?
Battle Droid: Two.
Oro Dassyne: What?! Give me those!

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Battlestar Galactica picture

Admiral Adama: So say we all.

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NCIS: Naval Criminal Investigative Service picture

Yankee White - S1-E1

Gibbs: I heard you quit, Agent Todd.
Kate Todd: Happy news travels fast. Yes, I resigned. It was the right thing to do.
Gibbs: Yep. Pull that crap at NCIS, I won't give you a chance to resign.
Kate Todd: Is that a job offer?

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Reno 911! picture

Deputy Travis Junior: Getting two tickets to an execution is like getting two tickets to NASCAR, except you know Jeff Gordon's gonna die.

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MythBusters picture

Jamie: Aren't tracer rounds illegal?

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Arrested Development picture

Pilot - S1-E1

Lucille: I'm giving the company to Buster.
Michael: Buster? You're giving the company to a guy who thought the blue on the map was land?

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Chappelle's Show picture

Tiger Woods: I always wanted to say this... fa-shizzle.

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My Life as a Teenage Robot picture

Male Receptionist: Oh, boy. Where to begin... where to begin? First of all, fatty, I'm not bowing down to anyone. Second of all, unless you're here for a supermodel audition you're not seeing anyone's master. Third of all, shoo.

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Xiaolin Showdown picture

Omi: This is most embarrassing.

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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles picture

Leonardo: Um, ladies and gentlemen. We have an emergency situation. Everyone needs to get to the escape pods now!
[No response.]
Raphael: How do you say 'bomb' in Futurese?
[General panic.].

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Miss Match picture

Kate Fox: Sometimes confronting the past is the only way to move on.

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Las Vegas picture

Samantha Jane "Sam" Marquez: I hate funerals. Pretending to mourn for someone you despise. Doesn't that bother you?
Delinda: Not me, I like pretending.
Mary Connell: Now that we know that Monica left it all to charity, I kinda feel like maybe she was just misunderstood.
Samantha Jane "Sam" Marquez: Really? I feel like maybe she was just a bitch.

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Tru Calling picture

Jack Harper: Good people has to die too, Tru.

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Dead Like Me picture

Penny: You're the one who was killed by a toilet seat.
George: God, will anyone ever let that go?

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Helen of Troy picture

Helen: Loving me kills people, destroys families, causes such grief you cannot imagine.

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The O.C. picture

Summer: Where other than the Bait Shop are tickets always plentiful and the band never too loud to talk over?

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Nip/Tuck picture

Christian Troy: I think I work better on women I've screwed. Once you've seen a woman's cumface, you've seen her soul.

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