Sheriff of Nottingham: Locksley! I'm gonna cut your heart out with a spoon.
Robin Hood: Then it begins.
Marlboro: My old man told me, before he left this shitty world, never chase buses or women, you'll always be left behind.
Commissioner Brumford: [On phone.] Hello? He did what? How many animals escaped? Oh, my god.
Frank: Hello, Commissioner. You're looking lovely this evening.
Commissioner Brumford: Do you realize that because of you this city is being overrun by baboons?
Frank: Well, isn't that the fault of the voters?
G-Money: I had my jimmy waxed every day last week.
Ninny Threadgoode: Hey Evelyn, somebody stole my house.
Chucky: Don't fuck with the Chuck.
Lawanda Dumore: I hate children. They ruin everything. If I had enough power, I'd wipe them off the face of the earth.
Frank Pesce Jr.: I wanna do something I never did before.
Frank Pesce Sr.: Oh really, then why don't you go upstairs and clean your fucking room.
Mike Waters: I love you, and you don't pay me.
John Connor: We've got company.
Miles Dyson: Police?
Sarah Connor: How many?
John Connor: Uh, all of them, I think.
Gaston: How can you read this? There's no pictures!
Belle: Well, some people use their imagination.
Ed Furillo: What if you don't encourage them, and they still come after you?
Mitch Robbins: It doesn't happen. See, women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.
Bonnie Rayburn: Good night! I'm going to bed.
Mitch Robbins: Good night! Sleep tight.
Ed Furillo: That was flirting.
Mitch Robbins: No, that was... Politeness. That was "have a pleasant and restful evening."
Ed Furillo: No, that was "I like your ass. Can I wear it as a hat?"
Eddie: Can't nobody sang like Eddie King Jr.
Thomas J. Sennett: Vada?
Vada Sultenfuss: Yeah?
Thomas J. Sennett: Would you think of me?
Vada Sultenfuss: For what?
Thomas J. Sennett: Well, if you don't get to marry Mr. Bixler.
Vada Sultenfuss: I guess.
Pugsley: Are they dead?
Wednesday: Does it matter?
Topper Harley: My father used to say that not playing to win is like sleeping with your sister. Sure she's a great piece of tail, with a blouse full of goodies, but... It's just illegal. Then you get into that whole inbred thing. Kids with no teeth who do nothing but play the banjo... Eat apple sauce through a straw... Pork farm animals.
Doughboy: Hos gotta eat too.
Woman: Wait a minute, who you callin' a ho, I ain't no ho!
Doughboy: Oops... sorry, bitch! (00:35:31)
Ronald Bartel: The funny thing about firemen is... Night and day they are always firemen.
