Best comedy movie quotes of 1989

Please vote as you browse around to help the best rise to the top.

Movie Quote Quiz
Back to the Future Part II picture

Biff: Go ahead, kid. Jump. A suicide will be nice and neat.
Marty: What if I don't?
Biff: [raising gun] Lead poisoning.
Marty: What about the police, Biff? They're gonna match up the bullet with that gun.
Biff: Kid, I own the police. Besides, they couldn't match up the bullet that killed your old man.
Marty: You son of a...
[Biff pulls back on the gun's hammer.]
Biff: Suppose it's poetic justice. Two McFlys with the same gun.

More Back to the Future Part II quotes
National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation picture

Clark: Worse? How could things get any worse? Take a look around you, Ellen. We're at the threshold of Hell.

More National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation quotes
Uncle Buck picture

Buck: What time do you want me to pick you up after school?
Tia: Don't bother! I'll get a ride with friends.
Buck: No, I have my orders. What time?
Tia: Are you really this stupid? I said I would get a ride. I always get a ride.
Buck: Hey, I'll just call the school, find out what time, and meet you right here.
Tia: Go ahead, call the school. I won't be here.
Buck: Stand me up today, and tomorrow I'll drive you to school in my robe and pajamas and WALK you to your first class. 4:00 okay?

More Uncle Buck quotes
When Harry Met Sally picture

Harry Burns: How long do you like to be held after sex? All night, right? See, that's your problem. Somewhere between 30 seconds and all night is your problem.
Sally Albright: I don't have a problem.
Harry Burns: Yes, you do.

More When Harry Met Sally quotes
Ghostbusters 2 picture

Judge Wexler: The Scolari brothers.
Ray: Friends of yours?
Judge Wexler: I tried them for murder. Gave them the chair. You gotta do something.
Egon: Why don't you just tell them you don't believe in ghosts?

More Ghostbusters 2 quotes
Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure picture

Abraham Lincoln: Fourscore and...[looks at his pocket watch]...seven minutes ago... We, your forefathers, were brought forth upon a most excellent adventure conceived by our new friends, Bill...and Ted. These two great gentlemen are dedicated to a proposition which was true in my time, just as it's true today. Be excellent to each other. And... Party on, dudes!

More Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure quotes
The War of the Roses picture

Oliver Rose: I think you owe me a solid reason. I worked my ass off for you and the kids to have a nice life and you owe me a reason that makes sense. I want to hear it.
Barbara Rose: Because. When I watch you eat. When I see you asleep. When I look at you lately, I just want to smash your face in.

More The War of the Roses quotes
Major League picture

Boyfriend: Stay away from her.
Jake Taylor: Suck. My. Dick.

More Major League quotes
The Dream Team picture

Billy: It's great to be young and insane.

More The Dream Team quotes
Harlem Nights picture

Richie Vento: Yeah, get me Hollycourt 55377. Hello, it's Daddy. Hey, darling. Put Mommy on the phone. Yeah, Barbara, it's Richie. Yeah lookit, I ain't never coming home no more. Take it easy.

More Harlem Nights quotes
See No Evil, Hear No Evil picture

Wally: I hear prison isn't so bad if you like it up the butt.

More See No Evil, Hear No Evil quotes
K-9 picture

Lyman: Dooley, what is it about me that makes you so passionate?
Dooley: Well, it's not your looks, Lyman. I guess it's your job.
Lyman: And knowing your methods of law enforcement, I don't suppose that you have a search warrant?
Dooley: Dog ate it. You can hang around his tail for an hour.

More K-9 quotes
A Grand Day Out with Wallace and Gromit picture

Wallace: No cheese, Gromit! Not a bit in the house.

More A Grand Day Out with Wallace and Gromit quotes
Collision Course picture

Detective Tony Costas: Stop that garment bag.

More Collision Course quotes
Look Who's Talking picture

Mollie: So you're the one who was kicking me.
Mikey: Well, you're the one who ate all that spicy food.

More Look Who's Talking quotes
Who's Harry Crumb? picture

Helen Downing: Back then, dinner and a movie might have gotten you into some girl's panties, but it's gonna take a lot more than that to get into mine.

More Who's Harry Crumb? quotes
Speed Zone! picture

Police Chief Spiro T. Edsel: Use unnecessary force, if necessary.

More Speed Zone! quotes
Parenthood picture

Marilyn Buckman: Cool is adorable. Adorable! Why didn't you write us when you had a son?
Larry Buckman: I didn't know myself until a couple of months ago. You see, a few years ago, I was living in Vegas with this girl. Showgirl. She was in that show 'Elvis On Ice'. Anyhow, we drifted apart, as people do in these complicated times, and then a couple of months ago, she shows up with Cool and tells me "You watch him. I shot someone. I have to leave the country " That's a parent?

More Parenthood quotes
Meet the Feebles picture

Trevor: I've heard better singing from a mongoose with throat cancer.

More Meet the Feebles quotes
How to Get Ahead in Advertising picture

Denis Dimbleby Bagley: My grandfather was caught molesting a wallaby in a private zoo in 1919.
Psychiatrist: A wallaby?
Denis Dimbleby Bagley: It may have been a kangaroo. I'm not sure.
Psychiatrist: You mean sexually?
Denis Dimbleby Bagley: I suppose so. He had his hand in its pouch.

More How to Get Ahead in Advertising quotes

Join the mailing list

Separate from membership, this is to get updates about mistakes in recent releases. Addresses are not passed on to any third party, and are used solely for direct communication from this site. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Check out the mistake & trivia books, on Kindle and in paperback.