Don Lockwood: What's your lofty mission in life that lets you sneer at my humble profession?
Kathy Selden: I'm an actress.
Don Lockwood: What?
Kathy Selden: On the stage.
Don Lockwood: Oh, on the stage. Well, I'd like to see you act. What are you in right now? I could brush up on my English, or bring along an interpreter. That is if they'd let in a movie actor.
Kathy Selden: I'm not in a play right now, but I will be. I'm going to New York...
Don Lockwood: Oh, you're going to New York! And then someday, we'll all hear of you, won't we? Kathy Selden as Juliet, as Lady Macbeth, as King Lear! You'll have to wear a beard for that one, of course.
Jeremy Baile: Good country, Glyn.
Glyn McLyntock: Yeah, real good country.
Jeremy Baile: Let's hope we can keep it this way. Missouri and Kansas was like this when I first saw 'em... good, clean. It was the men who came in to steal and kill that changed things. We mustn't let it happen here.
Assembly President: Deputy du Rouge, representing the Soissons district?
Andre Moreau: Mr. President, the deputy from Soissons will be absent from this assembly... permanently.
Rev. Martin Gregory: There's the church. A great little country church standing up there in the middle of the town. It's the center of the place architecturally. It should be the center of the place spiritually too. But it's not. No. That little tin-pot shack of a cinema they're going to tonight has more influence on the lives of people here than the church.
Vallo: You've sold me Humble Bellows - and to a king's flunky.
Humble Bellows: Aye. 'Tis my modest opinion that no man can fly pirate colors who's not willing to sell his friend, his sweetheart, or his mother.
Baron Jose Gruda: Well spoken, Mr. Bellows.
Vallo: Foul spoken it is, Humble Bellows. You've turned your hand against your captain's back. Yellow was never a pirate's colour.
Slimy: Nor rescuing a fair maiden a pirate caper.
Ebenezer Hawkins: You're just like your old pa. He was the lyingest, crookedest, mangyest, rottenest, low down critter than never drew a silver breath.
Peter 'Junior' Potter Jr.: Say, you really knew my daddy, didn't you? You, sir, have cast aspersions on my dear old daddy, the brave, low-down, mangy, crooked, drunken hero that won the West.
Mr. Stork: Here we are, now. Please don't crowd each other. Pick out the ewe that you like best, and she will be your mother.
Texan: A birthday cake! Now who coulda knowed it was my birthday? Especially when it t'ain't.
Prudence 'Spitfire' Stevens: My father taught me howt o defend myself against rough men, but he told me he could only warn me about gentlemen.
Jonathan: Don't worry. Some of the best movies are made by people working together who hate each other's guts.