Best mystery TV quotes of all time

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Movie Quote Quiz
Sherlock picture

A Scandal in Belgravia - S2-E1

Sherlock Holmes: Punch me in the face.
John Watson: Punch you?
Sherlock Holmes: Yes, punch me in the face. Didn't you hear me?
John Watson: I always hear "punch me in the face" when you're speaking, but it's usually subtext.

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Supernatural picture

Pilot - S1-E1

Dean Winchester: Driver picks the music. Shotgun shuts his cakehole.

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Bones picture

Dr. Temperance Brennan: I've never gotten a B and I never will.
Seeley Booth: That's my girl.

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Charmed picture

Cole: Phoebe, I love you. I don't know what's going on but maybe I can help. Would you like me to kill someone for you?

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Arrow picture

Honor Thy Father - S1-E2

John Diggle: The knife.
Oliver Queen: Right. The knife. I got lucky.
John Diggle: That was a kitchen knife. It wasn't even weighted properly and yet you threw it with accuracy across a ten foot room.
Oliver Queen: Exactly. I got lucky.

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House, M.D. picture

Fidelity (aka: Truth or Consequences) - S1-E7

House: As long as you're trying to be good, you can do whatever you want.
Dr. Wilson: And as long as you're not trying, you can say whatever you want.
House: So between us, we can do whatever we want. We can rule the world!

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Batman: The Animated Series picture

Christmas With the Joker - S1-E38

Joker: Jingle bells, Batman smells. Robin laid an egg. The Batmobile lost a wheel and the Joker got awaaaaaaaaayyyyy.

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Criminal Minds picture

Extreme Aggressor - S1-E1

Agent Hotchner: This is Special Agent Dr. Reid.
Man: You look too young to have gone to medical school.
Agent Reid: They are PhD's. Three of them.
Man: What, are you a genius or something?
Agent Reid: I don't believe that intelligence can be accurately quantified, but I do have an IQ of 187, an eidetic memory, can read 20,000 words per minute...yes, I'm a genius.

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Monk picture

Adrian Monk: Unless I'm wrong, which, you know, I'm not.

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Castle picture

Little Girl Lost - S1-E9

Beckett: [Growing weary of Castle and Sorenson trying to one-up each other.] Oh, for god's sake, why don't you both just drop your pants and get it over with?
Castle: I'm game.

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The X-Files picture

The Post-Modern Prometheus - S5-E5

[After spilling coffee on his lap.]
Mulder: Great, now my crotch will be up all night.

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Columbo picture

Columbo: Oh, I didn't come to ask any more questions. I came to arrest you.

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Law & Order: Special Victims Unit picture

Born Psychopath - S14-E19

Dr. Huang: I'm conflicted about labeling a ten year old a psychopath. But...
Don Cragen: "But"?
Dr. Huang: I've had a chill like that two times in my life. With death row serial killers.

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NCIS: Naval Criminal Investigative Service picture

Gibbs: I heard you quit, Agent Todd.
Kate Todd: Happy news travels fast. Yes, I resigned. It was the right thing to do.
Gibbs: Yep. Pull that crap at NCIS, I won't give you a chance to resign.
Kate Todd: Is that a job offer?

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Dexter picture

Dexter: I am a father, a son, a serial killer.

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CSI: NY picture

Blink - S1-E1

Mac Taylor: You're not a doctor. You're a murderer with a medical degree.

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Lost picture

The Glass Ballerina - S3-E2

Benjamin Linus: Your flight crashed on September 22,2004. Today is November 29th. That means you've been on this island for sixty-nine days. And yes, we do have contact with the outside world, Jack. That's how we know that during those sixty-nine days, your fellow Americans re-elected George W. Bush, Christopher Reeve has passed away, Boston Red Sox won the World Series.
[Jack begins to laugh.]
Benjamin Linus: What?
Jack Shepard: [Still laughing.] If you wanted me to believe that, you probably should have picked somebody else besides the Red Sox.
Bejmain Linus: No, they were down 3-0 against the Yankees in the Championship Series and then won eight straight.
Jack Shepard: [Skeptically.] Sure, sure. Of course they did.
[Ben turns on a VCR.]
Joe Buck: Back to Foulke... Red Sox fans have longed to hear it! The Boston Red Sox are world champions! A clean sweep of the St. Louis Cardinals, and the Red Sox celebrate in the middle of the diamond here at Busch Stadium.

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Stranger Things picture

Eleven: Friends don't lie.

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What's New, Scooby-Doo? picture

Pompeii and Circumstance - S1-E12

Saladicus: Those who are about to fight, salute me. I am the Emperor Caesar Saladicus. Do you have any last requests?
Shaggy: Hold the anchovies.

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CSI: Crime Scene Investigation picture

Lucky Strike - S3-E16

Nick Stokes: There's a sucker born every minute.
Gil Grissom: Yep, and they all come to Vegas.

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