Dean Winchester: Driver picks the music. Shotgun shuts his cakehole.
Klaus Mikaelson: You rant and rave about the monster I have become, but you, mother, you are the author of everything I am.
Angelique: Let me give you one word of advice, Dr. Hoffman. The pursuit of Barnabas Collins can lead to nothing but misery. He is a cold, harsh, unresponsive man."
Dr. Julia Hoffman: Who made him that way?
Carol: haven't had a chance to say, I'm glad you came back.
Daryl: To what? All this?
Carol: This is our home.
Daryl: This is a tomb.
Carol: That's what T-Dog called it, thought he was right, until you found me. He's your brother, but he's not good for you. Don't let him bring you down. After all look how far you've come.
The Post-Modern Prometheus - S5-E5
[After spilling coffee on his lap.]
Mulder: Great, now my crotch will be up all night.
Multiple characters: Mouth breather.
Morticia: Mr. Addams' treatment for Grandmama's back had the whole medical world agog.
Gomez: Agog? Aghast.
Damon Salvatore: I DO believe in killing the messenger. Why? Because it sends a message.
Coach Toomey: Actually, Burdett never made the team.
Carl Kolchak: No?
Coach Toomey: You see, his butterfly stroke was like an effeminate moth.
Norma Louise Bates: Why do crazy people keep gravitating towards me?
Courage: There's something fishy goin' on here, or my name is Stinky Looloo, and thank goodness it's not.
Father Marcus Keane: The power of Christ compels you.
The Crone: Do I look compelled, man of God?
Agent Devlin: Everybody's got a theory on the increasing violence in our society.
Agent Emmerich: My wife thinks it's the artificial hormones in beef.
Agent Devlin: What's your take?
Frank Black: I don't think it's the beef.
Alan Decker: It's okay. I'm used to the callous attitude mortals have towards vampires. I'm used to wandering the earth - reviled, hunted, hated. That's why I became a lawyer.
Merton: From an old legend, and the third season of Buffy.
Joel Hammond: Okay, we say we came across this murder site and we're just cleaning it up.
Sheila Hammond: Who cleans up murder sites?
Joel: I don't know. We're Mormons?
Sheila: Mormons don't clean up murder sites.
Joel: Mormons are helpful.
Harvey Denton: When I was younger I suffered terrible facial warts. I remember the whispered comments, "Here comes Harvey toadface." "Quick hide, toadface Denton is coming!"
Val Denton: And that was his mother and father.
Simon Holmes: Sometimes I wish we collected stamps for fun, instead of battling the forces of weirdness.
Dr. Egas Gottreich: Here they store what came before. Pain and suffering from days of yore. Before and after, tears and laughter. After comes before, before comes after. Past and future and then, hereafter. The naked and the dead, the young and the old. Their stories end here, their tales untold. Here sickness and death Have left their pages. Written in blood for all the ages. Someday, your story will be here, too.