Best family TV quotes of all time

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Movie Quote Quiz
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air picture

Bang the Drum, Ashley - S1-E2

Vivian: Philip, when I met you, you were into James Brown.
Will: He liked James Brown?
Vivian: Even wore his hair like him.
Will: He had hair?

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Batman: The Animated Series picture

Christmas With the Joker - S1-E38

Joker: Jingle bells, Batman smells. Robin laid an egg. The Batmobile lost a wheel and the Joker got awaaaaaaaaayyyyy.

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SpongeBob SquarePants picture

Dying For Pie / Imitation Krabs - S2-E6

Mr. Krabs: What's the most important rule here?
Spongebob: No free napkins?
Mr. Krabs: No, the other most important rule!
Spongebob: Only discuss the secret formula with Mr Krabs.
Mr. Krabs: As long as you do that, the formula is safe.
Squidward: I thought the most important rule was why do today what you can put off for tomorrow?
Mr. Krabs: But what's today, but yesterday's tomorrow?
Squidward: What?

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The Brady Bunch picture

Bobby Brady: Mom always says not to play ball in the house.

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A Series of Unfortunate Events picture

Violet Baudelaire: Why do you hate us so much?
Count Olaf: Because it's fun.

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The Andy Griffith Show picture

Opie's Group - S8-E9

Andy: Clara, sometimes a parent can't see what he should do, and sometimes it takes a person from the outside to show him. And I'd like to thank you.
Clara: Groovy.

Super Grover Premium member
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Gilmore Girls picture

Pilot - S1-E1

Rory: You look happy.
Lorelai: I am, kid.
Rory: Did you do something slutty?
Lorelai: I'm not that happy.

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Lazytown picture

Robbie Rotten: Have you ever heard the sound of a rubber ball breaking a window?
Trixie: Nuh uh.
Robbie Rotten: Would you like to?

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The Legend of Korra picture

Night of a Thousand Stars - S2-E11

Korra: You have a battleship?
Varrick: Of course I do! I bought the first one they made! Named her the Zhu Li.
Bolin: You named your battleship after your assistant?
Varrick: Yep! They're both cold, heartless war machines.

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Hannah Montana picture

Miley Stewart: I can't believe it. I'm going out with a ninth grader! Wooo!
Robby Ray Stewart: Well, don't believe it, because I'm not letting you go. Wooo!

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Gilligan's Island picture

Professor Roy Hinkley: Well, that glue is permanent! There's nothing on the island to dissolve it. Why do you know what it would take? It would take a polyester derivative of an organic hydroxide molecule.
Thurston Howell III: Watch your language! You're in the presence of a lady.

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The Tick picture

Interviewer: Well, can you... destroy the Earth?
Tick: Egad. I hope not. That's where I keep all my stuff.

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Animaniacs picture

Man: Do you know who I am?
Yakko: Why? Did you forget?

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American Dragon: Jake Long picture

Jake's Mom: Your sister really looks up to you.
Jake Long: She's two feet tall! She looks up to everybody!

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Leave It To Beaver picture

Eddie Haskell: Look Sam, if you can make the other guy feel like a goon first, then you don't feel like so much of a goon.
Wally Cleaver: I don't get that.
Eddie Haskell: Of course you don't. That's because you never went to kindergarten with a home permanent.

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Little House on the Prairie picture

Laura: I hate that Nellie Oleson.
Caroline: Laura! Don't say "hate" - don't even think "hate"! I'm sure Nellie has her good qualities somewhere.
Charles: Your ma's right, half-pint. Now on the way home, we'll try and think of some.

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Charlie and Lola picture

The Most Wonderfullest Picnic in the Whole Wide World - S1-E12

Lola: Fun, fun, funny and sun, sun, sunny.
Lotta: Yum, yum, yummy in my tum, tum, tummy.

heartis
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What's New, Scooby-Doo? picture

Pompeii and Circumstance - S1-E12

Saladicus: Those who are about to fight, salute me. I am the Emperor Caesar Saladicus. Do you have any last requests?
Shaggy: Hold the anchovies.

Quantom X Premium member
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The Jetsons picture

George Jetson: Jane. Stop this crazy thing.

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Home Improvement picture

Neighbours - S8-E20

Tim: Al, why don't you tell us your favorite part of gardening?
Al: Well, I'd have to say it's getting down and dirty with my hoe.

Phaneron Premium member
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